The heist to end all heists

The alarms have all been tripped. All of them. This isn’t the familiar, daily smash-and-grab. This is huge. A heist to end all heists. We go to our windows, careful to stay out of sight. It’s still far away, but the first reports are already flickering like sparks from a bulldozed lamppost: they’re working onContinue reading “The heist to end all heists”

Crouching Tiger, Obliterated Rhino

We all want to know what lies around the next bend, but nobody can read the future. Nobody, that is, except futurolog futuristologists futologistogist fut people who figure out likely scenarios using computer models, statistics, and industrial quantities of marijuana. In the final chapter of my 10% TOTALLY TRUE history book, The Unauthorised History ofContinue reading “Crouching Tiger, Obliterated Rhino”

The fault is in our stars

A misunderstanding was inevitable. The French delegation spoke very little English. The South African politicians who sat across the table spoke a little French but were just at that moment pressing lobster thermidor into their mouths and so their words were muffled. What they did manage to say, however, was that the were offering theContinue reading “The fault is in our stars”

No smoke without Koeberg

Last week I saw Cape Town die. A vast column of smoke was rising on the other side of the bay, an impossibly high V climbing into the sky. Whatever lay at the point of that V was not merely burning, it was being incinerated. This was a conflagration, a holocaust. And then the realityContinue reading “No smoke without Koeberg”