“It’s not sinking, it’s a submarine!”

Had Angie Motshekga been the owner of the White Star shipping line on the morning of April 15, 1912, history might have sounded quite different. As flashbulbs popped and journalists shouted questions, she and her team would have shuffled into place behind a table. An appeal for quiet; and then the big news, delivered with

Thick skulls

7.35AM, Monday morning, JG Zuma Primary School, KwaZulu-Natal. “Good morning, staff.” “Good morning, Headmaster.” “Right. Before we start, let’s address the elephant in the room.” “Headmaster, I must protest. You know how sensitive I am about my weight and – ” “Not you, Mr Dlamini. I am referring, of course, to the report in the

Dumb and dumbed down

This was going to be a letter to the matrics of 2014. It was going to be one of those wry, heart-squeezing things that go viral and get printed on canvas in gold ink and nailed up over log bars. It was going to contain quirky bits of advice like “Wear underpants!” (the exclamation mark